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Mama Resolutions for 2006

It's that time again to jot down some resolutions for the upcoming year.  As always, a new year brings hope and resolutions that oftentimes has the same flavor as before, but let me give it a shot.  Here are my top five parenting resolutions for the upcoming year.

1. Believe in my mama-ing abilities.  Two kids later, and I still stress about the tiny decisions I make as a mama.  Like wondering if the nose wipe is worth the cry of anguish from my infant or if it will mar him for life.  This year will be different, I will trust my instincts knowing that I'm doing my darnedest as a mom.  I'll try not to take it personally and realize that neither my baby's cries nor my nearly 3-year-old's outlandish behavior is not always a direct reflection on my mama-ing skills.

2. Mama as role model.  While I don't curse like a sailor, I do need to be aware that my sons pick up both my and my husband's good and bad habits.  I'm kicking my soda addiction, exercising more regularly, and using the TV less often as a babysitter.

3. Quality time with my sons.  I recently saw a bumper sticker that read something to the effect that "All mothers are working mothers" and how true it is.  I'm a working mother in the sense that I work outside of the home.  I still struggle with trying to make the most of my time with my kids when I'm not working.   This year I will try to focus on reminding myself that the time I spend with my sons should be quality due to the fact that the quantity of free time is in short supply.  When my older son tells me "no more check email mama" I will have to tear myself away from the computer, turn of the DVD player and play trains with him.

4. Recognize that there was life before kids.  Date night will be a recurring scheduled event for my husband and I. Date nights have been to few for us in past year, and we realize that the strength of our relationship is the foundation for our family.  If we are fulfilled in our relationship with each other, we can better manage the roller coaster ride of parenting.

5. Creating more community for mamas.  It's so easy to become recluse as a mama.  I go through periods where I feel like I'm just trying to get by, barely managing the kids and work, and not enjoying life as a mother.  When somehow I manage to emerge from the motherhood doldrums, I realize that I miss my friends.  As soon as I re-engage myself into the community of other mamas, I feel reinvigorated.  In the new year, I hope to do my part in creating more community for mamas in Portland.

Share, share!  What are some of your resolutions for this upcoming year?  It's always fun to hear what other mamas are up to.

Comments

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Hau your resolutions are so true to life as a mom, and #5 is so important and often the most overlooked. I'm always so much more balanced and happy when I've connected with other women. My own resolutions are sadly simple - I'm taking music lessons and vow to practice every day. Oh, and yeah, also to drink more water.

I ditto your five resolutions!! Each and every one. One thing I need to work on is my patience. Some say patience is a virtue. I want to keep my cool when each child of mine is asking me ten thousand things at once, on top of my spouse asking me another three thousand things. I don't want to snap when I get called upstairs for the seventh time and it's already 11pm and there are children wanting another glass of water or for me to scratch a back. The fact is, maintaining above items 2, 3, and 4 will help me preserve my energy for moments when patience is required. "K.I.T., keep it together, keep it together."

I guess I'm not a very good resolution setter. I do feel like I need to stop recessing into my little world but sometimes I feel like it's all I can do to keep it together from day to day just to get Andrew to bed. Then after that I'm so exhausted I have no energy for social exchange. This year I'm just setting small goals for myself. I'm also trying to force myself to look forward on my calendar, past the end of the day or the week. Sometimes I get so engrossed in making it from day to day that I totally forget to make any plans or get out of the house with friends. Always doing things on a whim doesn't always work out with multiple schedules. So yes, small goals that are achievable. They will change from week to week and month to month. Let me know if you want me to come hang out with the boyz while you and Joe have a date night. It would be my pleasure!

I love your resolutions Hau. I, like Olivia, am going to work really hard with keeping it together. I'm starting to put myself in timeout when I feel like I might blow. Jackson hates it; but, I prefer it to yelling at him.

So, on the idea of the date night, what about doing a co-op for evening/weekend afternoon stuff. Maybe the dates wouldn't last until the wee hours of the night; but, it could be a way to get in an early dinner, a hike, or maybe a movie. What do you think? Anyone interested in this idea?

Patience is always on my list of improvements!

Shetha: We will definitely take you up on your kind offer to babysit.

Erica: I like the co-op idea. Early dinners or short outings are great for us. Cole is still a bit too young to leave for long periods of time.

i'm totally up for a co-op type setup. we've been to two movies in 2-1/2 years. of course, as soon as mid-march comes around, we'll have a teeny tiny one again, and that will pretty much mean no breaks longer than an hour or two again for awhile, so perhaps i'm not the best person to get involved at the moment!

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